Buy Me What I Want, Not What I Need

Athough perhaps not strictly necessary, Andie decided that a trip to the Fashion Show Mall is a Vegas tradition and, true enough I suppose, they did not have that Diane Von Furstenberg dress at the factory outlets. Lunch at our next favourite buffet, in Paris Hotel. It's French (did you guess?). After feeding ourselves, fed some slots for a while before deciding a rest might be a good idea.

Dinner tonight in one of our favourite restaurants, Jasmine, in Bellagio. Upscale Chinese (did you guess?) and great views of the Bellagio fountains... which were off due to the wind (Andie not chuffed)! Then on to one of our favourite bars, Petrossian, for more champagne and a couple of choice single malts. Last night in Vegas so thought we'd make the most of it and cash in some travellers cheques and lose some cash on Blackjack - Hell, you get "free" drinks - but we held our own as it turned out.

Love, Las Vegas

Despite already having maxed out one of our two new credit cards, we convinced ourselves that a visit to the Las Vegas Premium Outlets was for needs and not wants. Picked up the usual bargains from the usual high street designers. Lunch at the Aladdin buffet, perenially voted #1 in Las Vegas and we couldn't disagree. It's a "spice buffet" so you get the idea - right up our street. We attempted to walk off lunch - no easy task - by footing it to Mirage Hotel for our evening engagement. Naturally this was no ordinary walk as it was via the Forum shops at
Caesar's Palace and Andie heaven - a Marc Jacobs and AP store right next to each other.

Sodding Penn & Teller (tagline "less audience members injured than last year") seem to be doing their very best to avoid us - every year we come here, we miss their show by a day or two. Despite having steadfastly avoided Cirque du Soleil in the past, we were tempted by their lastest show, The Beatles Love. Speakers on the back of each seat added to the effect of a most enjoyable musical experience. Except for all the f****** acrobats and dancers obviously. We
made the mistake of ordering a large magarita each; not clever to go large in Vegas (see picture). 1am Supper in Cafe Bellagio where bellinis are, oddly, frozen.

Champagne Buffet - just what we need!

Not a coincidence that we arrived in Las Vegas on a Sunday just in time for champagne brunch! We're at Bellagio (of course) which rather feels like a home from home, amazing really when you think of when you were wee and you'd never have dreamed you'd ever make it to Vegas. It truly is one of the modern wonders of the world.

After a hectic weekend in Frisco (as we now call it) we took it fairly easy tonight and dined at Sensi in the hotel; top cocktail of the night being the Sensillini, not including Andie's home made Hypnotic / Domestic Non Vintage champagne concoction. Sensi is another fusion place - Italian/Asian this time - but we knew we were on safe ground having been there previously and it also being voted one of Top 20 restaurants in the US. Certainly better than some Chindians we've dined at in Spain/Greece/Turkey anyway. Andie found her new favourite slot machine (see picture). We were also delighted the casino allows pets so we could continue our daily Dog Trump game. On that note... probably time for bed.

When in Rome and all that

Andie mysteriously discovered, after more than three weeks of non-stop eating and drinking, that some of her wardrobe had mysteriously shrunk while in the case. Weird. Iain confirmed this strange phenomenon while trying on his suit later for dinner. Only one thing for it then... shops. After all, this is the busiest shopping weekend in the US and San Francisco offers some of the best shopping in the world on our doorstep. When in Rome and all that.

Several department stores and posh undie and accessory outlets later, necessary purchases had been made (lunch being deemed, on this occasion, for wimps). On our return, we managed to secure a table for later at the hotel's renowned Asia de Cuba restaurant, offering a fusion of Asian and Latin cuisines. You're probably thinking same as we were - could go either way. Fortunately the chef was just the right side of "creative". Andie wasn't allowed lobster - the crab having won last night's fight - instead settling for a whole bass stuffed with crab, her favourite dish of the holiday so far.

For Helen's benefit, pre-dinner cocktails were a blackberry margarita and a lemongrass martini - both utterly delicious. The sparkling wine sangria with the meal weren't bad either. Iain would like to add that he could only agree with our cocktail waitress, Melanie, that Andie looked beautiful tonight. Awwwww.

A Day at the Bay

Although they may not be the most practical form of transport, cable cars are sure a cool way to clank up and down the City's hills and enjoy the Deco beauty of San Francisco in true 1920s style. We took one down to Fisherman's Wharf, a bustling strip of redeveloped waterfront. Andie became the latest victim of the famous Bushman (check him out on Wikipedia). Andie though wasn't impressed.

Took a Duck tour - quack quack - around the City and the bay (for the uninitiated, the Ducks are refurbished World War II Amphibious landing craft) - a great way to get a feel for the City in our experience of the Boston equivalent.

Late pasta lunch on Pier 39 then on to our pre-booked Alcatraz evening tour. Enjoyed great views of the Bay and the City at dusk although the famous Golden Gate bridge is disappointingly unimpressive. The tour itself was most entertaining with night falling adding to the general ambience. Short ferry trip back to Pier 39 to enjoy the delights of mesquite grilled fish at Pier Market. We seem to be striking it rather lucky with good seating and cool views in our chosen eateries; Pier 39 is famous for it's colony of sealions on the adjacent floating docks and they duly obliged by a performance in full view of our table.

Despite the joys of the cable car, we plumped for a taxi after a long day to have a quick one in the hotel cocktail bar. Several glasses of champagne (and a couple of single malts) later...

Everyday is, Like, Thursday (AKA Thursday Part Two)

It's lucky we like Thursdays really as, having crossed the International Date line, we got to experience it all
again in LA. Well, in LAX at least as we're actually travelling on to San Francisco. Fortunately Andie - it's time
to name and shame - had a good idea to fill the near four hour wait. Deciding we were flying with United, we
dutifully made the trek to Terminal Seven, which presumably has it's own postcode. Puzzled that the automated check-in machine failed to acknowledge our booking after several attempts, we discovered we were in fact flying with American. Andie wishes to make clear that all our other domestic US flights are with United and that it was probably Iain's fault anyway. Iain's mood fortunately lifted on seeing a Chillis and a Starbucks in our actual Terminal.

Short flight to San Francisco to arrive at our Hotel, the ultra chic Clift, early Thursday evening. Our first taste of our usually favoured boutique hotel on this trip and it's pretty cool (tho not as cool as it thinks it is). It's right in the heart of the city by Union Square so dead handy for us though unfortunately also for the local jakeys who eerily hang about just outside. It's Thanksgiving here so it's quiet to say the least, many bars and restaurants are shut. So what more excuse do you really need to head to Chinatown? Ate at the recommended R&G Lounge, oddly similar to the place we ate on our first night in Hong Kong (which seems so long ago). We certainly weren't disappointed.

Final day in Fiji (AKA Thursday Part One)

Pretty much more of the same today - reading, cocktails, pool. Our flight wasn't til 11pm but fortunately we'd managed to wangle a free late check out on our room til 8pm. This really helped the day not feel like we were just hanging around waiting to leave. Andie bought some souvenirs (for herself) and off to the airport we went for a ten hour flight to LA, rather oddly arriving before we'd even left Fiji.

Another day, another room

Had to change room - again! - after a comedy effort by the Duty Manager and Engineer to fix our room safe failed miserably. It might have been funny - after all, the rooms are luxurious with a lovely view from our balcony to enjoy while waiting about - except that we hadn't had any lunch and so missed the spa treatments we'd booked. We didn't let it ruin our afternoon though, how can you here really? Quick lunch then spent rest of the afternoon reading and enjoying cocktails by the pool (or in the bar in Iain's case, still feeling the effects of the sun).
Couldn't resist the Indian buffet tonight and were pleasantly surprised for it to exceed our expectations. Came back to our room to enjoy the bottle of Aussie fizz the management had kindly left to apologise for the hassle earlier. The Fijians are undoubtedly the friendliest people on earth though perhaps not the most efficient.

Bula!

The fly spray they gave us didn't really do the job with the ants so we decided to move rooms. An inconvenience rather than a real hassle as we hadn't actually unpacked as such. Once sorted, we went down to plan our spa treatments for tomorrow then visited our sister hotel for a wood fired pizza for lunch. It's just a ten minute walk along the beach (or you can take the Bula bus!) and we stopped off at a terrific spot on the way back, totally deserted like having our own
island (the hotel's not that busy) with the South Pacific lapping at our feet. Dinner tonight at the hotel's Pacific Pasta Kitchen where everything is made to share (except dessert, oddly). Jolly nice.

Beautiful Fiji

Took a wander over to the two sister hotels on the resort which we also have access to. Decided ours was best so tailed it back for lunch. Lazed on our private beach, bit of a swim. got burnt (again - ouch). Back early so we could be out to enjoy cocktails at sunset by the sea and the hotel's evening ritual - a torchlighting ceremony and firedance. Dinner was at the hotel's Japanese teppanyaki restuarant, Hamachos. Delicious and a real eating experience too, for us anyway as we'd never been that fussed with Japanese before. Slight bummer on return to find our room had been invaded by ants. We'd have hoped our lizard would have had them.

Paradise Found (Stick it Up Your Junta)

Cheery c*** of a taxi driver decided to put the fear of God into Andie en route to the airport. Not only Borat but Military coups also appear to be following us about. And according to Mr Cheery, Fiji was ready to go a bit Pete Tonga (you may need to check BBC news to get that). Cue rush to the nearest wireless hotspot at the airport to seek Foreign Office advice and check how far we were from the Capital. Having concluded we'd take our chances with the Junta, we hadn't bargained on the comedy 1970s Air Pacific planes and airport taxi - I swear the latter had an 8 track wired for sound. Nice though to be greeted with men playing guitars rather than brandishing AK-47s. Woman at Customs: "So are you on honeymoon then, doing all this travelling?" Andie "No, I just like spending all his money."

Fiji is f****** Heaven but. End of. Just beautiful. Our Hotel - Westin Denarau Island - is fabulous. Nice grill meal with the calming waves of the South Pacific for background ambience (the Bose sound and video system in our room is pretty good too right enough), Andie enjoyed sharing her prawns with the hotel cat and her kittens. Andie further points out that the picture is a pastiche of the Japanese penchant for active photography and she wasn't that drunk
(yet).

Step Back In Time

We suppooooose that the perfect antidote to getting burnt yesterday is for it to rain all day today. Isn't it?? Hmm, maybe. Made the best of it though by visiting a few areas of town we fancied away from the City. Firstly took the ferry to Devonport, a quaint village renowned for it's Victorian architecture, boutique shops and cafes. Mount Victoria also offers the best views of Auckland. Just not today. In fact Devonport has the feel of an English seaside town, or more precisely how one would be without the neds and before the rot has set in. Kind of odd
to come halfway around the world to experience but cool at the same time. After this, visited the suburbs of Parnell and Ponsonby, upmarket areas of Colonial chic. We had the best fish & chips in Auckland for lunch (official this time) along with various coffees (non Starbucks - coffee is very good here) and a visit to the Belgian Beer Cafe.

Got back early again for a quick change in order to take advantage of Happy Hour. Bartender: "When you say champagne Sir, do you mean champagne or...?", Iain: "No, I mean the cheap shite you're passing off as champagne for $4." Did the job though. Then on to the excellently named Monsoon Poon, one of our new favourite restaurants (we, rather sadly, often debate this - Cafe TuTu Tango is still tops since you asked). Perhaps the fact that we got a table in a private area made it even more memorable. Graduated to yeractual Bolly and some rather nice cocktails. Hell, they even did a frozen one (see picture). Oh, the food was rather good too - South East Asian Fusion (like Mao's, only good). Iain was warned about the heat of the Bang Bang chicken but, of course, took no heed and suffered after (Still worth it - Iain).

We Love Auckland!

To be honest, we only stopped off in New Zealand to break up the trip between Australia and Fiji. So we're as surprised as anyone that we just love it here in Auckland. Started the day with a harbour cruise then some lunch by the Quay. Andie swears it was the finest cajun snapper sandwich she's ever had. Spent the rest of the afternoon wandering around the main shopping area of Queen St (Dougie, we smelled your Asian food court - amazing - but were too full to sample any tasty delights). Best department store ever - Smith & Caughey - with an actual selection of coat stands. Iain was disappointed though that they wouldn't deliver (FYI no-one seems to make them in the UK).

We hadn't realised that we'd had quite so much sun - see photo of Iain's red face to match his raspberry beer (they, rather amusingly we thought, call it "lady beer" here). We are though nothing if not resilient. The Kiwis do love their Happy Hours and when in Rome... well, 2 Coronas and 2 glasses of (French) champagne for 15 bucks (slightly over a fiver) by the waterfront is too good to be missed. Topped this off with a cocktail from our new favourite vodka bar chain, Lenin, and still managed a nice meal at Al Dente (Auckland's Finest Italian - we can't challenge it really). Feeling a bit funny now though so off to bed...

Being Stalked By Borat

Sacha Baran Cohen appears to be following us around. First he turns up in Sydney, then Melbourne - same jokes each time of course - and now the c*** holds us up for ages on our flight to Auckland with his lackey's piss poor attempt to get him and his 20 strong entourage VIP treatment. Nice to be on our favoured upper deck of a Jumbo when we finally got going. Iain decided his mission today was to sneak some (gummy) snakes on the m*****f****** plane and past New Zealand's strict food customs police. Success. Good flight but getting slightly annoyed on learning that we've lost two more hours en route (Iain says: Dinner time and I felt I'd just eaten my - admittedly somewhat large - buffet breakfast).

Managed to get a harbour view room by some - justified - moans about the initial room allocated by hotel. Stamford Plaza is in a great location again and it'll be very nice when it's finished. Initial impressions of Auckland are extremely positive, seems like the perfect blend of City and holiday destination we like. Time was getting on a bit so we just investigated the Harbour area and grabbed some dinner at a Mexican cafe. Andie purchased a singing kiwi toy to annoy the cats with on our return. Back in room now planning our activities.

Yarra Valley

If you weren't already aware, you would be after reading this that we rather prefer the delights of "urban culture" to ticking off "must see" sights. So you may be surprised to learn that we spent today visiting the beautiful Yarra Valley. You may be somewhat less surprised to learn that it was as part of a wine tasting tour. Visited four vineyards of which the highlight was undoubtedly Domaine Chandon, Moet's Australian "champagne" house. A most agreeable and indeed educational experience (we'll no doubt bore you with the facts later). Iain ruined any semblance of culture on our return to Melbourne by visiting the excellently named "Lord of the Fries" to challenge their claim of Best Chips In the World. Andie, of course, didn't want any, only eating about half in the end. As the weather was seriously Wintry - Melbourne's coldest November day in 50 years no less - we visited trendy Southgate on our doorstep for dinner. It was though, bizarrely, packed so we plumped for the hotel's Asian brasserie instead.

Doing Melbourne in a Day

We had hoped Melbourne would be a more sedate and cultured alternative to Sydney like, in our opinion, Boston is to New York. There are certainly touches of that but there just seems to be something missing - history most probably. With help from Jim & Katrina's blog, we picked out just the things we most wanted to do in 24 hours. So after the hotel's ace buffet breakfast - it had a chocolate fountain!... for breakfast!! - we headed for Old Melbourne Gaol, where Ned Kelly was hung. Jim, we feel we must really point out here that the armoured mask says it's for kids only. Apparently though there's a ghost in one cell. Took a pic of Andie in it to show no such things exist.

Then on to Little Italy for coffee and chocolatey shenanigans at Koko Blacks. Someone, who shall again remain nameless, had already enjoyed much delight at the chocolate fountain but still saw fit for a cake, hot chocolate (with ice cream) and chocolates combo. So that was lunch out (though not a major problem as a huge and delicious bowl of laksa - Malaysian soup - was enjoyed by the other party in Chinatown for a piddling three quid). Andie enjoyed the boutique shops on Collins Road, picking up a couple more pieces of interesting jewellery. We didn't have time to do a ferry trip or the Museum which we'd have liked to, instead we decided to investigate the restaurants at Docklands - we chose Bhoj, allegedly fine Indian cuisine (it pretty much was) - and, of course, the hotel's cocktail lounge.

Melbourne

Fairly effortless trip between Sydney & Melbourne. A bit too efficient if anything as our room in the Langham wasn't ready yet. No worries though (sorry) as we're right next to Southgate with a more than decent selection of restaurants. Just too many b****** students. Both deciding we had a hankering for pasta, chose a fine and great value Italian (Melbourne seems much cheaper than Sydney) for lunch. Straight out to take the free tram - nice touch -
round the city. Good timing too as it started to blow a gale and pour (Sydney was in the low thirties when we left).

We had decided to take things easy last night but, it being our last night in Sydney and Kylie, it was another late finish we're ashamed to say. So we've decided to be very sensible and spend tonight in planning our next few days, in a sober state as well. Just enjoyed a nice grill meal via room service. Andie enjoyed eating dinner in her new PF Sock Monkey Romance PJs but was a bit concerned her sorbet, to accompany a delicous apple tart, was melting. They should have put it in a flask with Iain's soup (it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold you know).

Darling Kylie

Took ferry to Darling Harbour today. Started with a visit to Sydney Wildlife World to see some cuddly koalas and wallabies (and some not so cuddly individuals too of course). We'd kept this particular visit til today as it happily coincided with the Thai Food Festival in the adjacent park. With ten of Sydney's Top Thai Dins parading their wares, chicken satays and fish cakes aplenty were munched in lieu of lunch [Iain says: with the now hard to find black sports mixture gums for afters from the local UK sweet shop - could it get much better?]. Purely as it was such a gorgeous day and view again, cocktails on the Cockle Bay Wharf then back in time for a quick buffet dinner at our hotel's Mix restaurant and a change before today's main event.. the princess of pop... The Homecoming... Kylie.

Andie was worried for Kylie's health and didn't think she should be back on stage so soon. Iain pointed out that Andie most likely wouldn't have bought her new perfume yesterday had she not. Kylie does look older and somewhat drawn though for her to be there at all is the most remarkable thing. The show was, indeed, a show albeit slowed down from it's previous incarnation that Andie had made us watch the night before. Bono - publicity shy singer from the Irish band U2 - turned up to do Robbie's part in Kids. We think he dingied Especially For You. I guess you don't get to see Bonio and Kylie duet every day. In Sydney.

Final thoughts on Sydney. Wonderful place for a City Break, just not worth a 22 hour flight. In fairness, we didn't - and never intended to - go and see the Blue Mountains and so on to get the full flavour of Aus.

Manly

Visited the historic Queen Victoria Building this morning. Iain says: Lovely bit of architecture. Andie says: SHOPS!!! And there were lots of them, including the two department stores nearby. Cue brief credit card frenzy before taking the ferry to Manly for lunch. Excellent schnitzel, mussels and, of course, beer in the Bavarian Beer Cafe (see pic of Iain with the proprietor) on the trendy Manly Wharf. Glorious day too. We managed an earlier start this morning (hmm... wonder why??) so still had time for a visit to Manly Beach. Actually far superior in all respects to Bondi. But we knew that - you just have to go to Bondi, dontcha?

We'd caught sight of a delicious looking Chinese restaurant on Circular Quay (near the Opera House) and, hey, it's Saturday night. We like Chinese on a Saturday night. And we hadn't had any since Hong Kong. Chinese that is. It was even called The East (which is amusing only to those of you who have read Glue by Irvine Welsh). Getting a bit predictable now to say that it was delicious and that we followed it up with equally delicious cocktails in the hotel bar and came back to enjoy some more drinks and the memorable view from our room. But it's what we do.

Bondi

Later than planned night last night - raided the mini-bar - so slept in a bit. But no worries as it's a nice relaxing day in Bondi. Had an ace grill lunch overlooking the beach then enjoyed the weather with the help of some juices and beers. Not much more to add here really - it's a day at the beach! Stopped off at Bondi Junction on way back - Sydney's top mall - but really no more than a training exercise for Las Vegas and New York for Andie.

We decided to swap sides on the Quay tonight for a view of Sydney Harbour Bridge. Couple of glasses of Chandon Rose by the Opera House went down rather well then we found ourselves in a vodka bar enjoying some shockingly nice (albeit not particularly Russian) food too. Back to our own Hotel for cocktails in the Lounge Bar and retired to room for a planned early(ish) night... oh dear, they've restocked the mini-bar though.

Sydney Harbour

Thursday
Bit of a lie-in - we are on holiday after all - then grabbed a quick pizza before our afternoon coffee cruise around Sydney Harbour. Impressed the Aussies seem to enjoy a good skinful on their lunch-hour, disappointed not to be served by an Edinburgh barmaid (so it's not an exchange programme then?). Having been cloudy when we first opened the curtains - Andie was, needless to say, unimpressed at this - fortunately it brightened up substantially during the cruise and our moods with it. The cruise itself was certainly comprehensive - we now know the price of real estate in all of urban and suburban Sydney (maybe the tour guide was sacked as an estate agent for similarly tellng clients where and when Russell Crowe jogs or where Mel Gibson's accountant lives). Stunning scenery obviously.

Headed up to our 36th floor cocktail bar (Blu Horizons - oh dear) for pre-dinner Bellinis with, as you would now expect, a fabulous harbour view. We eschewed the dubious delights of it's sister restaurant, Altitude (suckling pig stuffed with foie gras - no thanks, cobber) to visit the fabulous Doyles by the Quay. Right up our street, it's a family run seafood restaurant with simple tasty food and such a great attention to detail they even have their own small vineyard (delicious unoaked chardonnay). A delight.

Arrival in Sydney

Wednesday
Trailfinders had pre-booked us a transfer to the airport which sounded like a good idea at the time until we got the wee note thru our door saying we were being picked up at 6am. Then it got worse. One of us [Andrea says: we'll leave his name off to avoid embarrassment, shall we?] managed to leave his laptop bag at hotel reception. On informing the rep, we were told in a typically friendly yet indignant manner that we'd have to get off and go and get it ourselves. Andie continued on while Iain grabbed a taxi and actually made it to the airport first [Iain says: I wanted to get a limo and wave at the bus coming in but I guess the coffee and chocolate donut I had while I waited was enough]. Flight to Sydney was with Qantas. It'd be nice if they offered a quick course in the exec lounge before take-off on how to operate their Skybeds. We're not really here to write a detailed travelogue though so we'll just say that the flight was good - enjoyed the on-demand movies, Little Miss Sunshine we hadn't seen and was ace - but overall the food and service we didn't think matched BA. Despite a comfy flight, I'm sure Andie was glad to get off anyway having been bored by the 20th fact from Freakonomics, which Iain had finally got round to reading. Losing yet more hours en route, it was 10.30pm by the time we reached our next destination, the Shangri-La in Sydney. Pleased to see a decent room service menu, we ordered a couple of Indian curries (you can take us out of Glasgow, etc.) from the Asian fusion restaurant which we enjoyed alongwith our view of Sydney harbour and the Opera House. Shangri-La incidentally is a first class business hotel in a great location but feels a bit like Aussie style no frills compared to The Peninsula. The picture is the view from our hotel room.

Spring Moon

Tuesday night
Forgot to give a mention last time to the fab urinals in Felix where one - if anyone here were that way inclined of course - could well imagine they were urinating all over Kowloon, like a God.
Spring Moon was interesting. Great food, great decor as promised. Unfortunately no-one else had heard and halfway through the meal, we found ourselves the only remaining diners. While the undivided attention of six waiters is, at times, endearing, at other times it can be a tad overwhelming. You can't help but think they're laughing at your piss-poor chopstick technique or at ordering - quite by mistake - the most expensive Chinese tea on the menu. In reality, they were genuinely interested in what we thought of the food compared to Western Chinese restaurants. Farewell drink in the cocktail bar and a sad farewell to Hong Kong.